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Literature Text
“Ugh...” Hidan stumbled into the Akatsuki kitchen, crashing into a counter and falling to the floor with a loud crash, startling everyone in there.
“What's up with him, un?” Deidara asked, leaning over the table to stare at the immortal, who was lying on the floor, eyes shut.
“He's tired,” Kakuzu explained, walking into the kitchen, bending over and hauling the Jashinist to his feet by his hair. Hidan merely mumbled something and swatted the hand away, causing him to drop back to the floor again.
“And why is he tired?” Sasori asked, grabbing a napkin and throwing it at Deidara. “Brat, wipe your face.”
“Okay, danna....”
“He stayed up too late reading the “Great Book of Jashin” again,” Kakuzu said, picking the immortal up by one arm and dumping him in a chair. Hidan's head fell forward to the table, hardly giving Deidara any time to grab his bowl of cereal out of the way as he hit with another loud crash.
“Aren't you guys leaving on a mission today?” Kisame asked, watching as Deidara poked the side of Hidan's head over and over.
“Yeah. But we can't leave if he's like this.”
“Ooo! Ooo! Tobi knows how to wake Hidan-sempai up!” the masked boy yelled, jumping up and down and spilling his orange juice all over himself.
“And how would you do that, Tobi?” Itachi said tiredly, tugging his fingers through his messy black hair, which he had yet to tie back.
“Let's give him coffee!” Tobi proclaimed proudly, looking around the table, his voice happy and excited.
Silence greeted his ears.
“Isn't that a good idea?” Tobi said hopefully, looking around the group again.
“Tobi, do you know what happened the last time we gave Hidan coffee?” Kakuzu asked slowly.
“No...Tobi doesn't....”
“He went insane. And he somehow found Deidara's bombs. He blew up one of our hideouts.”
“Oh, Tobi remembers this, because Tobi was near the base when it went boom!”
“And that is why we are not giving Hidan coffee,” Itachi continued, grabbing a bagel from Deidara's hands.
“Hey, that's mine, un!”
“Not anymore, blondie.”
“Danna...”
“Itachi, don't be mean.”
“Let's get back to the topic, you guys,” Kisame said.
“But Hidan-sempai is nearly asleep now, surely he won't get that hyper...?” Tobi asked hesitantly.
“I'm not risking it,” Kakuzu muttered, grabbing an apple and stuffing it into the pocket of his cloak.
“But Tobi has a point, un!” Deidara said, looking up, a spoon in his hand. He'd been using it to whack the Jashinist's head with, and now the silvery hair was dripping with milk. Hidan hadn't even flinched at the blows, and his gentle snores could be heard around the kitchen.
“Don't you dare---shit.”
'What is it, Kakuzu?” Kisame asked.
“I forgot my checkbook. I should go get that...” With that, the banker turned and walked from the kitchen.,
Deidara's face split into an evil grin.
“Tobi, get the coffee, un.”
“You don't mean to--”
“I assure you I do, un.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“BOW DOWN TO JASHIN OR BURN IN HELL, DUMBASSES!”
The entire Akatsuki, save for Kakuzu, who was still looking for his checkbook, were crowed inside of the pantry, peeking out through a crack as they watched Hidan's scythe tear open a cabinet, Tobi's honey nut cereal spilling open and to the floor.
The ground was already covered in smashed glass, broken plates, spilled food and the bits and pieces of chairs that Hidan had torn apart. The table was a wreck, gashes up and down the wood and one of the legs torn off.
Tobi was hiding in the very back, his eyes wide behind his mask.
“Maybe giving Hidan-sempai coffee wasn't a good thing,” he whispered.
“Gee, you think, un?”
“I can see why Kakuzu wanted to avoid this,” Itachi commented dryly as they heard the sound of another dish breaking.
“Note to self; Hidan is not a good person to give caffeine to, un.”
“WHO GAVE HIM COFFEE?!”
“And now we'll have to deal with Kakuzu, un.”
“This is all your fault, brat.”
CRASH
“WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!” came Pein's voice.
“And Pein as well it seems,” Itachi said.
“Who knew what one breakfast drink could do to a person, un?”
“Deidara, I'm hiding the coffee pot from you after this blows over.”
“You have good reason, un.”
“What's up with him, un?” Deidara asked, leaning over the table to stare at the immortal, who was lying on the floor, eyes shut.
“He's tired,” Kakuzu explained, walking into the kitchen, bending over and hauling the Jashinist to his feet by his hair. Hidan merely mumbled something and swatted the hand away, causing him to drop back to the floor again.
“And why is he tired?” Sasori asked, grabbing a napkin and throwing it at Deidara. “Brat, wipe your face.”
“Okay, danna....”
“He stayed up too late reading the “Great Book of Jashin” again,” Kakuzu said, picking the immortal up by one arm and dumping him in a chair. Hidan's head fell forward to the table, hardly giving Deidara any time to grab his bowl of cereal out of the way as he hit with another loud crash.
“Aren't you guys leaving on a mission today?” Kisame asked, watching as Deidara poked the side of Hidan's head over and over.
“Yeah. But we can't leave if he's like this.”
“Ooo! Ooo! Tobi knows how to wake Hidan-sempai up!” the masked boy yelled, jumping up and down and spilling his orange juice all over himself.
“And how would you do that, Tobi?” Itachi said tiredly, tugging his fingers through his messy black hair, which he had yet to tie back.
“Let's give him coffee!” Tobi proclaimed proudly, looking around the table, his voice happy and excited.
Silence greeted his ears.
“Isn't that a good idea?” Tobi said hopefully, looking around the group again.
“Tobi, do you know what happened the last time we gave Hidan coffee?” Kakuzu asked slowly.
“No...Tobi doesn't....”
“He went insane. And he somehow found Deidara's bombs. He blew up one of our hideouts.”
“Oh, Tobi remembers this, because Tobi was near the base when it went boom!”
“And that is why we are not giving Hidan coffee,” Itachi continued, grabbing a bagel from Deidara's hands.
“Hey, that's mine, un!”
“Not anymore, blondie.”
“Danna...”
“Itachi, don't be mean.”
“Let's get back to the topic, you guys,” Kisame said.
“But Hidan-sempai is nearly asleep now, surely he won't get that hyper...?” Tobi asked hesitantly.
“I'm not risking it,” Kakuzu muttered, grabbing an apple and stuffing it into the pocket of his cloak.
“But Tobi has a point, un!” Deidara said, looking up, a spoon in his hand. He'd been using it to whack the Jashinist's head with, and now the silvery hair was dripping with milk. Hidan hadn't even flinched at the blows, and his gentle snores could be heard around the kitchen.
“Don't you dare---shit.”
'What is it, Kakuzu?” Kisame asked.
“I forgot my checkbook. I should go get that...” With that, the banker turned and walked from the kitchen.,
Deidara's face split into an evil grin.
“Tobi, get the coffee, un.”
“You don't mean to--”
“I assure you I do, un.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“BOW DOWN TO JASHIN OR BURN IN HELL, DUMBASSES!”
The entire Akatsuki, save for Kakuzu, who was still looking for his checkbook, were crowed inside of the pantry, peeking out through a crack as they watched Hidan's scythe tear open a cabinet, Tobi's honey nut cereal spilling open and to the floor.
The ground was already covered in smashed glass, broken plates, spilled food and the bits and pieces of chairs that Hidan had torn apart. The table was a wreck, gashes up and down the wood and one of the legs torn off.
Tobi was hiding in the very back, his eyes wide behind his mask.
“Maybe giving Hidan-sempai coffee wasn't a good thing,” he whispered.
“Gee, you think, un?”
“I can see why Kakuzu wanted to avoid this,” Itachi commented dryly as they heard the sound of another dish breaking.
“Note to self; Hidan is not a good person to give caffeine to, un.”
“WHO GAVE HIM COFFEE?!”
“And now we'll have to deal with Kakuzu, un.”
“This is all your fault, brat.”
CRASH
“WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!” came Pein's voice.
“And Pein as well it seems,” Itachi said.
“Who knew what one breakfast drink could do to a person, un?”
“Deidara, I'm hiding the coffee pot from you after this blows over.”
“You have good reason, un.”
Literature
AKATSUKI APARTMENT part 3
Akatsuki headquarters. Kakuzu repeated.
Hidan nodded. Were called the Akatsuki, and we hang out here. That makes this our headquarters, asshole. He stepped inside. Hurry up. Kakuzu sighed and followed the silver haired teen inside.
The apartment wasnt much bigger than his own; it had a kitchen and a living room, separated by a three foot tall wall so you could look into the next room. There were two doors built into the right hand wall; the banker assumed they led to bedrooms. There was no dining room; only a table pressed against the mini-wall on the living room side.
The living room held tw
Literature
TEA TIME
Kakuzu sighed and sat back in his chair, staring up at the sky. For once the air was free of clouds, allowing the warm rays of sunlight to fall upon the British countryside and warm the earth.
He reached up, tugging on his shirt collar. Curse the fashions of London, he was practically being choked by this latest design! And he was beginning to think that his tailor (the rat-faced little fiend) was lying about it just to see the banker suffer. If the man wasnt so cheap, Kakuzu probably would have foreclosed on the mans shop long ago.
His attention returned to the present when he caught sight of his butler approaching the table he
Literature
AKATSUKI APARTMENT part 4
After his first few weeks, Kakuzu couldnt imagine his life without the Akatsuki. They were his friends, partners in crime, everything. He still didnt know too much about their backgrounds, but that was fine with him. After all, from what he could tell, they didnt have too many problems.
That delusion was shattered one day after school.
The Akatsuki were walking out of the building, heading towards the base. Suddenly, Deidara turned on a street corner, going off down a road Kakuzu hadnt been on. Deidara, where are you going? he called.
Deidara stopped and turned, giving him a half-hearted smile. My
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Yeah, this is kinda weird.
I was talking to about me writing about Zetsu giving Tobi sugar in Puppets and Bombs, and she wondered what would happen if you gave Hidan coffee.
Well, I thought about it, and this is what came to my mind.
Yeah.
It's not really that good, I'm kinda sleepy and rushed it, but it's still kinda stupid and funny, no?
I was talking to about me writing about Zetsu giving Tobi sugar in Puppets and Bombs, and she wondered what would happen if you gave Hidan coffee.
Well, I thought about it, and this is what came to my mind.
Yeah.
It's not really that good, I'm kinda sleepy and rushed it, but it's still kinda stupid and funny, no?
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Can you write more? Please? Pretty please? *puppy-eyes-look*